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Francistown Times: News from the Imperial Federal Kingdom

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Bruce wrote:Puget prepares firing...err "testing" of own nukes Razz
Our nukes are always pointed toward Vancouver and PUget Razz

Vancouver is really close to your shores...we should have a Cuban Missile Crisis! Very Happy

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Defers Film Festival Award Ceremony takes place
by Nicholas Kawak

Top: Loggers; Bottom: Attack of the Killer Parrots

DEFERS, RCD- Yesterday the First Defers International Film Festival Awards Ceremony took place. Anticipation was high as to which films would win awards, as many of the film companies premiering films at the festival are among the largest on Adonia. Although, of course, betting on the winners of different awards was discouraged, it was still commonplace. Speculation was especially rampant as to who would win the Golden Ceannaire (Best Director), Golden Fabhcun (Best Actor), Golden Iolar (Best Actress), and Best Overall Film awards, as they are considered to be the most prestigious in the film industry.

After the usual opening formalities, the awards began to be presented. The first one, the Defers Award for Best Romantic Drama, was presented to the Grandian film Loggers, directed by Andrew Markson, and starring such Grandian film stars as Jim Falkirk and Annette Shelling. The next one, for Best Military Film, was an incredibly close contest between Cuando Empecé Pensar (When I Started to Think), from Insulo, starring Victor Olivo as the Insulonian national hero Don Capel, and What Really Matters, a joint Grandian-Posilliponian film, directed by Tristan Lucas Hughes, and starring Désirée Jocelyn as Princess Ariana Dankov, but ended with Cuando being declared the victor.

Due to there being only one film in the "Documentary Films" category, hike, directed by Bonifaci Pearson, automatically won the award for Best Documentary Film. The Martopian film The Jungle, directed by Luke Williams, and featuring Steven Dreamer, the son of the late Martopian President, as Hunter Jackson, was also the only film in the "Nature Films" category, and so automatically won the Defers Award for Best Nature Film. The originally intended recipient of the award for Best Other Film was the Grandian Mystery in Erikkson, directed by Sam Brian, and starring Anna Shmidt as Ruth von Dellwick, but on the morning of the ceremony, all the judges unanimously voted to change that to Attack of the Killer Parrots, also a Grandian film, directed by Kyle Grant, of Trentannian ancestry.

After these awards came the ones that were most looked forward to, colloquially referred to as the "Golden Four". The first one, the Defers Golden Ceannaire for Best Director, went to the Ruterian Jaime Aragon, who directed The Time, which has been praised for its stunning visual effects, but which has fallen short in other areas. After that, the Defers Golden Fabhcun for Best Actor was presented to Trentannian-Grandian Andy Norman, who portrays New Friscian detective Tommy la Fon in Attack of the Killer Parrots. The Defers Golden Iolar for Best Actress was next, and was presented to Posilliponian Désirée Jocelyn, who portrays Princess Ariana Dankov in What Really Matters.

The final, and most anticipated award, the Defers Award for Best Overall Film, was to be presented to one of the following nominees:
The Jungle
Cuando Empecé Pensar
Attack of the Killer Parrots

After a suspenseful wait, the winner was announced to be Loggers, to much applause. In the words of Fin Carter, the main presenter of the Festival: "This film featured such a unique story line with new twists everywhere but not so twisty that it was incomprehensible. It was an incredible tragedy and surely, the production staff should remain together to create more films and return down the road in the festival."

Table of Awards:

Attack of the Killer Parrots (2) (Best Other Film, Golden Fabhcun [Best Actor])
Constantly Meeting (0)
Cuando Empecé Pensar (1) (Best Military Film)
hike (1) (Best Documentary Film)
Loggers (2) (Best Romantic Drama, Best Overall Film)
Mystery in Erikkson (0)
The Jungle (1) (Best Nature Film)
The Time (1) (Golden Ceannaire [Best Director])
Through the Western Hedges (0)
What Really Matters (1) (Golden Iolar [Best Actress])

Grand prepares launching of nuclear missile
by Amy Higgins

Shot Desert Fox, the largest Grandian nuke detonated to date

APELKOS, MAL- The Ministry of Defense wishes to inform the USNW that it will be testing a live nuclear missile on the 20th, which shall, after being launched from a military base in Grand, enter orbit, and fly over the following countries, in the following order: Puget, Andarana, Alzata, and Zebtesia. It will deorbit near the Zebtesian border, and will re-enter the atmosphere over northern Malo, striking its target in the Forgian Desert Testing Range.

As for the shot "Desert Fox", it was a complete success, with a higher than expected yield of 37 kilotons.

In other news...

- Kyle Grant confirms sequel to Attack of the Killer Parrots, currently in negotiations with actors
- 9-month old Prince Michael takes first steps
- Erikkson SimLympics conclude with a bang
- 8-year old twin Princesses Mary and Anna leave for Carpathia

Last edited by Daniel on Sun Jul 17, 2011 1:21 am; edited 3 times in total (Reason for editing : changed a few minor mistakes)

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The Provincial Republic of New Chandler condemns the nuclear testing that is planned by the Grandian government.

Though it was a nice read! Smile


Member (GSK)
:O I got featured in another CJ! awesomeness

My only quip is CAL isn't a common abbreviation, though i'm not too familiar with newsprint abbreviations, the common one for calma is RCD Smile

Excellent News, this might just be the best newspaper in the union Smile

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The Republic of Puget threatens sanctions against Grand for the testing of nuclear weapons over their airspace and WILL shoot it down if necessary.

@Will: As reigning Trixie winner for Best Newspaper, I'd like to dispute that. Razz

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The Imperial Federal Kingdom of Grand, Belluterra, and Malo would like to make it clear to the Republic of Puget that there will be no nuclear testing over Pugentine airspace, and that the space capsule will transit over Puget for less than 10 minutes, at normal orbital altitude. Destroyal of the capsule would result in a cloud of space debris that would remain in orbit for years, presenting a potential hazard to all satellites and other spacecraft all over Adonia with an orbital altitude within several kilometers of the altitude of the capsule. In light of these facts, Emperor Charles I begs the Republic of Puget to reconsider its statement.

K50: Thank you! Smile
Will: I knew you'd like it Razz I changed it to RCD, and thank you Smile
Bruce: Which newspaper won the award? Razz

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The Republic of Puget will allow testing, but recommends using that energy to invest in renewable energy and cities.

All of them. Razz

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HA! You only had one nomination Razz


Escambia is threatening sanctions against Grand, despite their claims for safe testing. We do not recommend testing nuclear weapons or the use of such weapons. Should this continue expect sanctions

New Friscia condemns such act of random and outright unnecessary testing of nuclear weapons by Grand and Belluterra.

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Coronation of Charles I to take place in one week
by Samuel Morris

His Royal and Imperial Highness King-Emperor-Elect Charles I
WESTERN PALACE, GRA- In one week from now, the much-awaited coronation of our new King-Emperor, Charles I, shall take place. He will make several acheivements until now not done by any other Grandian monarch, such as:

- Becoming the first Grandian King-Emperor to visit the Viceregal Kingdom of Malo
- Becoming the youngest Grandian, Belluterran, or Malonese head of state, at only 18 years old
- Becoming the first Grandian King since King Andrew II, who died in 1807, to be descended from the first Grandian monarch, Francis I

Foreign dignitaries from all over Adonia, from Trentannia to New Friscia, New Chandler to Utrova, are planning to attend what is likely to be the biggest Grandian event in years.

Desert Sky all clear
by Amy Higgins

Shot Desert Sky, which will most probably be the largest ever Grandian nuclear weapons test
APELKOS, MAL- In the latest developements of Operation Desert that have been released to the public, Desert Sky, the most massive nuclear weapon ever detonated in the history of Grand, and one of the largest nuclear weapons ever detonated, after being deployed from an Aikon I ICBM, reentered the atmosphere and struck its target in the Forgian Desert Firing Range several hours ago, exploding with a yield of approximately 9.4 megatons. The Forgian government is said to be outraged over the explosion of a nuclear weapon only around 100 km from the Forgian border, and is said to be seriously considering ending all diplomatic relations with Grand, Belluterra, and Malo.

Tresia tests nuclear weapons near Pugentine border, tension rises
Reprinted from an original article by the Pugetine Associated Press, (c) 2011

DAWSON, PUG- Puget has had some bad luck with Tresia, their eastern neighbor, over the last century. From an independence struggle, to sharing the pain of Trentannian invasion, to hostile relations, this has been no smooth road. Tresia recently announced succcessful testing of plutonium-based nuclear weapons only feet from the Pugetine border. 4 people were killed during testing due to vaporization on the Puget side of the border. These four, ages 18-24, were hiking near the border as part of their National Park Ranger training. "We must act now to not only soften, but destroy this threat!" said Pugetine President Bruce Englehardt.

In other news...

- Air Puget sold to Imperial Airlines for 425 million enieo
- Francistown officially announces plans to bid for upcoming Adonia Games
- Why is Utrova bringing a limo and ten police cars to the coronation? Click here to see the real reason
- Minister of Defense pledges to bring an end to Operation Desert by mid-August

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We're invading Torshia!

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coolio Smile


Bruce wrote:We're invading Torshia!
You mean Tresia?

Torshia is Lucy's country Razz

No, he meant Torshia :evil: Razz

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No, I meant Tresia! Name is too similar... Razz

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Bruce fails! HAHAHA Very Happy


Epic fail...

Anyway, great news paper, very informative. Smile

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Member (Malinova)
Member (Malinova)
The Tsar will be condemning this website in Utrova for providing false and unrelavent reasons for bringing the ten Royalna Militzia cars and the Royal Limousine.

-From the Foreign Minister to the United Sovereign Nations of the World, Stanislav Soltys

Sorry I had to, Razz

Great newspaper!

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Final test of Operation Desert takes place
by Amy Higgins

Shot Desert Winds
APELKOS, MAL- It is now official: Operation Desert is over, having lasted 37 days, and having performed six nuclear tests, including one taking place underground. The last one, Desert Winds, was a test of Grand's nuclear artillery. It was a success, with a yield of around 15 kilotons, making it suitable for use as a tactical nuclear weapon. Thus, with the detonation of Desert Winds, Operation Desert has come to a close. Grand now knows the full capability of its nuclear arsenal.

jonDYman planning world tour
by Teddy Arnolds

DARTHEL, GRA- Darthel. A bleak mining city, well-known for the large gold mines in the area. The mines have brought in a substantial income for the nation, but at a price: the city is the most polluted in Grand by far, mostly thanks to the mining techniques employed until recently. Despite recent clean-up efforts, and switching of mining techniques from heavily toxic gold cyanidation techniques to more environmentally friendly, relatively, open-pit mining, the area is still heavily polluted, with the locals suffering as a result.

To raise international awareness of the Darthelish plight, Grandian pop icon jonDYman, himself a Darthelite, is planning a world tour which, in addition to raising awareness of the problem, is planned to raise funds for a further cleanup of the area. The tour is planned to begin August 14.

In other news...

- Queen Monica backs down from planned invasion of San Jorge, recognises independence
- Francistown bid for 18th ISC session in progress
- What's up with Princess Frances? Click here to see her latest escapade
- Preparations for commemoration of 60th anniversary of Trentannian invasion of Grand underway

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Utrova Attacked!!!
by Amy Higgins

Utrovan task force en route to Usenbal
ORKOVGRAD, UTR- Things are in a state of confusion here in the Utrovan capital, as we have received word that a large Rallistanian army has attempted to invade Utrova via Solvia, a former USNW member state. However, thanks to the excellent defenses in place on the Solvian-Utrovan border, most of the Rallistanians didn't make it home alive, let alone in one piece. During the confusion, four nuclear landmines were detonated, vaporizing thousands of the enemy on the spot. Hours later, Rallistanian dictator Usef Sanhidrin issued a declaration of war against Utrova. A large number of bombers & fighters were dispatched to destroy Utrovan cities near to the border, but most of them were shot down over Solvian territory by the SAM launchers placed around the border. Utrova has just dispatched a large task force to launch a counterattack on Rallistanian soil. Our beloved Charles I has pledged that he will provide, to the best of his ability, whatever his cousin, Tsar Stanislav VIII, needs to defend Utrova.

Speculation is rife, especially as to what could be the cause of this sudden invasion, and also about what role Solvia is playing in the conflict, as the original invasion was launched from Solvian territory, and many of the invading aircraft were shot down over Solvia. More on this story as it develops.

Francistown wins ISC bid
by Mark Billson

Logo of Francistown's sucessfull bid to host the ISC Session
FRANCISTOWN, GRA- The local population is ectastic, as Francistown has been announced to have won the bid for the 18th ISC Session. The session is scheduled to take place this weekend; the two biggest contenders for hosting the next Simlympics are: 1) Maine City, from the United Republic of Llithustania, and 2) New Chandler City, from the Provincial Republic of New Chandler.

In other news...

- King-Emperor Charles' dachshund raids kitchen cellar, eats 76 hot dogs
- Utrova panning 2012 Summer Simlympic bid
- Princess Frances is unusually inactive lately- or is she? Click here to see what she's been up to lately
- Today is Memorial Day! Be sure to wear red, yellow, green, and blue!

Last edited by Daniel on Fri Sep 09, 2011 4:37 am; edited 1 time in total

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Forgia ceases relations with Malo
by Amy Higgins

Flag of the Kingdom of Forgia
APELKOS, MAL- Following a six-month diplomatic stand-off, the Kingdom of Forgia has withdrawn all diplomats from Grand and Malo and closed its embassies there. Relations between Malo and its eastern neighbor Zebtesia have always been bad since 1951, when, as the Great Adonian War was coming to a close, Forgia and Zebtesia, another country on Malo's northern border, invaded what was a much larger Malo back then and took over around 70% of Malonese land, including the very fertile Zebtase Delta, which alone covers as much area as Malo does today. After the union in 2005 of Grand & Belluterra and Malo, Grand inherited many of the diplomatic situations Malo was in, including During the summer of 2011, Malonese-Forgian relations sunk to a level not seen in decades as Grand commenced a series of nuclear tests in the Malonese desert only around 100 km from the border, which included testing a 9.4 megaton device, the largest Grandian nuke ever detonated. Since then the relations between the two countries have been continuously spiralling downwards, culmanating with the withdrawal of Forgain diplomatic staff from Grand, Belluterra, and Malo.

Major riot in Merida
by Rupert Atapax

A crowd of rioters burning vehicles in the Zocalo
MERIDA, RUT- There was a major riot in Merida, the capital of Ruteria, yesterday after 4 men were shot dead outside the Royal Palace. According to Ruterian law, if anyone comes near to the palace with a gun, barring the police and secret service, they will be shot without warning. The four men who were killed, according to witnesses, were passing by the gates of the palace with handguns prominently displayed around their waists, in flagrant disregard for the Ruterian law. Thus, according to the law they were dangerous criminals, to be shot on sight. This was done, and they were all killed. Within minutes, a crowd had gathered to protest this turn of events. The crowd quickly grew, and when confronted by police, it quickly changed into an angry mob, which grew into a riot, centered in the historic Zocalo district, smashing windows, overturning and burning vehicles, looting stores, and the like. The riot has apparently been quelled now. Casualty counts are preliminary, but currently stand at 13 injured, in addition to the 4 men who were killed. King-Emperor Charles' cousin, HMR Queen Monica I, was not available for comment at the time this went to press.

In other news...

- New Chandler wins bid for XV Simlympiad
- Princess Amanthis' 10th birthday is in three days! Her brother Charles I has a surprise waiting...
- Utrova wins bid for 2012 Adonian World Cup
- Super Katz are coming to a theater near you! Be there, September 14!

Last edited by Daniel on Fri Sep 09, 2011 4:38 am; edited 1 time in total

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Member (Oxacmela & Balisca)
Member (Oxacmela & Balisca)
Queen Monica will be available for the press tomorrow at six.

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Member (Malinova)
Member (Malinova)
Utrova hopes this will not lead to a downfall of Ruteria. Utrova will try to send any needed aid.

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